Begin

I ran far away. I didn't tell people where I was going. I hinted off on where I might run to, but no one was probably listening. Hard to tell whether that's a good thing or a bad thing. I just remember I had a problem with the people that read what I wrote, yet at the same time it felt like no one was watching. Not sure, things don't add up when I explain it that way.

Either way, I guess it happens like this. I started "blogging" back in 2001. There wasn't even a word for it back then. I just referred to it as typing online. Hard to believe it has almost been 7 years. Whatever.

I've written in so many places over this decade. I wonder why? Why can't it be just in one place? Why do I have to run back and forth, between blog and a physical journal? A red book from a blue book? Livejournal or Blogspot? What does it all mean? I've never really sat down and figured it all out. I imagine it's some complicated life puzzle. A part that I'm not ready to sit down and tame yet. Too many other things are going on right now. Or then again, am I just telling myself that?

Too many questions.
Not enough answers.
Too much life.
Not enough time.

So, I'm going to brainstorm here. There are questions of about life, school, music, a career, relationships, drugs (which are starting to play a bigger part as I get older), video games. These are all topics that seem to revolve around my life. Some may appear more shallow than other's, but usually people with closed minds seem to think up things like that. Therefore, I guess these topics will be discussed at a later date or in the near future. Oh yeah, and whatever is on my mind. After all, isn't that what blogging is all about? Typing your thoughts and putting them on the internet for people to see and maybe...just maybe they'll relate to it. To feel like we're not alone after all. A friend recently posted on her livejournal that typing things out was therapeutic. I could not agree more. It does help, but only to an extent at certain times. Kinda like the small print on an add. Everything in life comes with an asterisk and small print.

WE'RE ALL THE SAME
*yet we are also all different...

I guess that's how it works.

But this time around I'll try and be more thoughtful. Ok, maybe... I like to have a little fun, obviously. I've noticed that in my writings over all these years that the line begins to blur. What I type here, won't necessary be around forever. So, how do I define what is a public matter that I can share with everyone and what is a private matter that will never see the light of day and will stay in the journal that I keep hidden all throughout the apartment? Actually, since I'm the only one here it just sits out in the open for now. But still!

That should be it for now. I'll come back to point out something.

Edit: I really wanted the h5n1 url at blogspot, but some stupid idiot stole the name already. http://h5n1.blogspot.com . It's ridiculous, really. I'm tired of people talking about the end of the world. And to think, a perfectly good URL was just WASTED for this persons utter insanity. So, Tokyo Firestorm it is.